Monday, September 29, 2008

Get The Midas Touch

A group of researchers put some coins in the coin return slots of public pay phones and then watched the people who made calls to see if they would reach in to check if there was any change that someone before them forgot.

Whenever a person retrieved the coins from the money return slot, one of the researchers walked up to the person and said that they think that they left some money in the phone, by chance, notice any money in the slot? 97% of the people who took money from the coin slot said no, that they hadn't found any money in the phone. They lied.

With the next group of money grabbers, then the researchers changed thier approach.
Now, instead of asking the way they did before, when they asked the people who had taken the money out of the coin return slot if they had noticed any money in the slot, the researchers lightly touched the people on the arm or shoulder. Ready for this?

95% of the people who had been touched said that, yes, they had found some coins in the slot, and gave it to the researcher.

From 97% dishonesty to 95% honesty....
And the only variable was the touch on the arm.
Now why would that be?

Well, when we like people and when they like us, we touch them and they touch us... either with hugs, pats on the back, hand holding, ticking, high-fiving, wrestling, kissing, a quick rub, a massage... lots of different ways.
Sure... to show approval and to celebrate, we touch. Its just automatic... built into us. And we love it.

So, when the researchers touched the people they were studying while they asked them if they found any change in the coin slot, the people immediately felt more comfortable and closer to the researcher...Instantly closer. All because of a touch.

So, what's the lesson?

If you want to gain trust and familiarity, try a gentle and familiar touch and you will get your way and persuade others to your way of thinking a whole lot more often.
People will most definitely respond positively if a touch is innocent enough and not sleezy.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Attitude Determines Altitude

The story is told of a woman who during the war went to live with her husband in camp on the Mojave Desert.
She simply hated the place; the heat was almost unbearable, 125 degrees in the shade, the wind blew incessantly, and there was sand- sand everywhere.
Finally, in desperation she wrote to her parents in Ohio that she couldn't stand it another minute and was coming home.
Quickly came the reply by airmail from her father - just the two familiar lines:
"Two men looked out from the prison bars... one saw the mud, the other saw stars."
The daughter did some real thinking, not only with the intellect but also with her heart. She decided to stick to her post.
She made friends with the natives, learned to love the country, and eventually wrote a book about it.
The desert hadn't changed, but her attitude had. Because she listened with her heart to the words her father sent, a whole New World opened up to her.

So, the next time you have a problem -- at home or at work, big or small -- decide to manage your attitude toward it. Try changing your beliefs about the problem. When you change your beliefs, you also change the consequences of the situation.

Unlike some things in life, we can choose our outlook. Sometimes we just need a reminder that happiness can often simply be a result of choosing attitudes.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

The Magical Mustard Seed

There is an old Chinese tale about a woman whose only son died.In her grief, she went to the holy man and asked,"What prayers, what magical incantations do you have to bring my son back to life?"

Instead of sending her away or reasoning with her, he said to her, "Fetch me a mustard seed from a home that has never known sorrow.We will use it to drive sorrow out of your life." The woman went off at once in search of that magical musturd seed.

She came first to a splendid mansion, knocked at the door, and said, "I am looking for a home that has never known sorrow. Is this such a place? It is very important to me". They told her,"You have certainly come to the wrong place ," and began to describe all the tragic things that recently had befallen them. The woman said to herself, "Who is better able to help these poor, unfortunate people than I, who have had misfortune of my own?" She stayed to comfort them, then went on in search of a home that had never known sorrow. But wherever she turned, in hotels, and in other places, she found one tale after another of sadness and misfortune.

The woman became so involved in helping others cope with their sorrows that she eventually let go of her own. She would later come to understand that it was the quest to find the magical mustard seed.

Don't spend your life brooding over sorrows and mistakes. Don't be one who never gets over things.

No one has everything and everyone has something of sorrow intermingled with the gladness of life. The trick is to make the laughter outweigh the tears.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

A Little Kindness

Here's a true story of a little boy who thirsts for attention.

There was a little boy who was perplexed about life.It seems he could not help doing things that would call attention to his antics. He would get things and he would do things that would irk the other kids in the boarding school where he was studying.
Whenever something was amiss, it became prevalent for everyone to surmise that he would be the culprit.
One evening, in the place where he lived , he unexpectedly recieved a pack of fried salted peanuts from the person in authority.
The bag of peanuts in hand, the little boy stood in awe, he did not know what to say.
He could not believe that he was worth this much attention without him doing anything at all!
He went back to his sleeping quarters feeling happy and in a daze....
Shortly, he came out of his room and he in turn, surprised the kind Peanut Giver with a "gift" of his own.
He gave the Peanut Giver the "gift" -wrapped in a white paper saying softly: "I found this." Then he timidly walked away.

Was the money really found by the little boy?
Did the Peanut Giver make a big mistake???

The Peanut Giver would like to think that the little boy felt he was valued, so he was encouraged to do good, so he did the right thing.

Mother Teresa of Calcutta said: